150 New Dad Jokes for 2025 – Hilarious, Unique, and Groan-Worthy

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new dad jokes for 2025

Welcome to our ultimate collection of 150 fresh and funny dad jokes for 2025—perfect for sharing laughs at work, home, or anywhere else! In this article, we’ve rounded up all kinds of humor, from clever puns and one-liners to groan-worthy jokes that are bound to make your coworkers roll their eyes (in the best way).

We’ve got knock-knock jokes, quirky jokes about everyday life, and even some tech-themed laughs for the gadget lovers among us. Whether you’re looking to break the ice in a meeting, bring smiles during lunch breaks, or just want to be the office comedian, this list has you covered.

These jokes are clean, lighthearted, and packed with 2025 flair, so they’ll hit the funny bone no matter the occasion. Get ready to make your colleagues, friends, and family chuckle with this treasure trove of laughter-inducing dad jokes!

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Classic One-Liner Dad Jokes 2025

  1. I told my wife I’d make 2025 my year. She said, “Is it leap year? You seem to skip goals.”
  2. I decided to work out this year… does lifting a donut count?
  3. My calendar for 2025 is full already—it’s mostly naps and snacks.
  4. They said time flies, but my watch is still ticking.
  5. I tried writing resolutions but ended up writing a grocery list.
  6. Why don’t clocks get tired? They’re always winding down.
  7. I tried to eat healthier in 2025 but my fridge staged a snack attack.
  8. I bought a 2025 planner but forgot to write in it. That’s the plan.
  9. I took up birdwatching this year. Turns out they’re winging it too.
  10. My New Year’s resolution? To avoid resolutions. Mission accomplished.
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Playful Dad Jokes Puns 2025

  1. I’m not great at math, but I know 2025 is an odd year.
  2. This year, I told my plants I’d leaf them alone. They’re thriving.
  3. I joined a gym in 2025… their Wi-Fi is excellent.
  4. My car and I have a lot in common—we’re both running on empty.
  5. The baker’s New Year resolution? To roll with the dough.
  6. I bought new shoes for 2025, but they’re already sneaking up on me.
  7. Why did the banana go to the party? To peel out in style.
  8. I signed up for yoga this year; turns out, I’m a natural at lying down.
  9. What do you call a cow in 2025? Moo-tivated.
  10. My microwave is faster than my internet, but at least the popcorn doesn’t buffer.
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Knock-Knock Dad Jokes 2025

  1. Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Ken.
    Ken who?
    Ken you believe it’s already 2025?
  1. Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Hatch.
    Hatch who?
    Hatch you a happy New Year, 2025!
  2. Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Ice.
    Ice who?
    Ice to meet you in 2025!
  3. Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Broken pencil.
    Broken pencil who?
    Never mind—it’s pointless!
  4. Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Cow says.
    Cow says who?
    No, silly! Cow says moo!
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“I Have a Joke About…” Dad Jokes

  1. I have a joke about 2025, but it’s still a work in progress.
  2. I have a joke about calendars, but it’s pretty dated.
  3. I have a joke about elevators, but it has too many ups and downs.
  4. I have a joke about resolutions, but I’ve already broken it.
  5. I have a joke about my boss, but I’ll save it for the break room.
  6. I have a joke about my car, but it stalled.
  7. I have a joke about coffee, but it’s too espresso’d.
  8. I have a joke about chickens, but they crossed the line.
  9. I have a joke about paper, but it’s tear-able.
  10. I have a joke about time, but I’m running out of it.
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Tech Humor Dad Jokes for 2025

  1. Why did the laptop go to therapy? It couldn’t stop crashing.
  2. My phone’s screen is cracked, but we’re both broken and still functioning.
  3. Why don’t programmers get out much? They’re too busy coding relationships.
  4. I told my computer I needed space, and it deleted my files.
  5. Why don’t smartwatches make jokes? They don’t have the time.
  6. I tried talking to my toaster, but it wasn’t plugged in emotionally.
  7. Why did the printer break up with the paper? It couldn’t handle the pressure.
  8. My keyboard said it needed a break; I suggested the space bar.
  9. I bought a smart fridge in 2025—it knows more about my diet than I do.
  10. The cloud has all my data, but I’m stuck with the rain.
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Workplace Dad Jokes Humor

  1. Why did the stapler go to the party? It wanted to be part of the group.
  2. My boss told me to think outside the box, so I left the meeting.
  3. Why did the clock get fired? It was taking too much time off.
  4. I tried working from home, but my couch demanded a meeting.
  5. My coworker said they love Mondays… I don’t trust them anymore.
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Life and Love Dad Jokes 2025

  1. My wife said I’d lose weight if I stopped eating so much. I said, “That’s a lot to digest.”
  2. Why did Cupid go to school? To improve his aim.
  3. I told my crush I’d write a song for her, but the only note I hit was “flat.”
  4. My dog thinks I’m amazing. My cat, however, has different purr-spectives.
  5. I tried gardening this year but my flowers got rooted against me.
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Dad-Level Groan-Worthy Dad Jokes

  1. I told my son to watch the clock. He said, “It’s still there, Dad.”
  2. I told a joke at the family dinner, and now I’m the black sheep.
  3. I told my friend I’d turn over a new leaf this year, and they handed me a rake.
  4. My doctor said I needed more exercise. I walked out of the appointment.
  5. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
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Miscellaneous Gems

  1. Why did the astronaut bring a ladder? To reach new heights.
  2. I bought a new lamp, but it didn’t light up my life.
  3. My favorite food is leftovers—it’s like dinner déjà vu.
  4. Why do fish never get invited to parties? They don’t have the scales.
  5. I tried learning to dance, but I’m more of a stand-still performer.
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Family Dad Jokes

  1. My kids told me to stop telling dad jokes. I told them I’d quit when they start laughing.
  2. My wife said I’m like a broken clock. Right twice a day.
  3. My daughter asked for a phone for 2025, so I gave her the one from the kitchen wall.
  4. My son asked if he could borrow my tools. I said, “Screwdriver? I hardly know her!”
  5. My family said I should run for office. I said, “I’d rather walk.”
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Foodie Dad Jokes Humor

  1. I tried making sushi for the first time. It was a raw experience.
  2. Why did the soup feel sad? It lost its stock.
  3. I ordered a pizza, and they asked if I wanted it cut in six or eight slices. I said, “Four—I’m not that hungry.”
  4. My fridge and I are having a cold war over leftovers.
  5. I bought a sandwich for my dog. Now he thinks he’s the big cheese.
  6. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They might crack up.
  7. I told my coffee it’s the brew-tiful start to my day.
  8. I love pasta, but it’s always penne for my thoughts.
  9. Why don’t tacos ever share? They’re nacho problem.
  10. My diet plan for 2025 is just to eat fast—before anyone notices.
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Fitness and Health Dad Jokes 2025

  1. My trainer told me to take a plank. So, I built a deck.
  2. Why did the runner bring a pencil? In case they needed to draw a finish line.
  3. My treadmill and I are having trust issues—it keeps ghosting me.
  4. I tried lifting weights, but my grocery bags were too heavy.
  5. Why did the salad go to therapy? It had too many layers.
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Techie Dad Jokes 2025

  1. Why do tech guys hate nature? Too many bugs.
  2. I told my computer a joke, but it didn’t byte.
  3. My phone suggested “Dad Jokes 2025” for my blog. It knows me too well.
  4. Why did the Wi-Fi break up with the router? It felt disconnected.
  5. I got a smart TV, but it still doesn’t laugh at my jokes.
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Animal Dad Jokes 2025

  1. Why did the dog join the New Year’s parade? He wanted to lead the pack.
  2. My cat joined the fitness craze. It’s doing purr-lates.
  3. Why don’t fish play basketball? They’re afraid of the net.
  4. I taught my parrot to say “2025 Dad Jokes.” Now he’s the life of the party.
  5. Why don’t elephants use computers? They’re afraid of the mouse.
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Travel Dad Jokes Humor

  1. I told the GPS I’d take the scenic route. Now we’re lost, but it’s beautiful.
  2. Why did the map refuse to work? It folded under pressure.
  3. My suitcase and I had a falling out—it felt too much baggage.
  4. I told the plane joke, but it went over everyone’s heads.
  5. My car asked if we were there yet. I told it, “Just drive.”
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New Year’s Resolution Dad Jokes

  1. My resolution for 2025 is to stop procrastinating… starting tomorrow.
  2. I tried saving money this year but ended up buying snacks instead.
  3. Why did the clock start working out? It wanted to get its time in shape.
  4. My scale is broken—it keeps telling me to eat less.
  5. Why don’t resolutions ever stick? They slip through the cracks.
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Office Humor Continued

  1. I told my boss I’m working hard—my coffee’s doing the heavy lifting.
  2. Why did the stapler get promoted? It always kept it together.
  3. I told HR a joke about salaries. They said, “Keep dreaming.”
  4. Why did the copier start singing? It found its toner.
  5. My keyboard and I are on the same page. It gets my shortcuts.
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Groan-Worthy Dad Jokes

  1. I told my car to chill. It gave me the cold shoulder.
  2. Why don’t vampires use social media? They can’t handle the likes.
  3. My mirror and I have a great relationship—it reflects my humor.
  4. I taught my alarm clock to tell jokes. It’s the loudest comedian I know.
  5. Why did the notebook feel important? It was full of dad jokes.

Music and Entertainment Dad Jokes

  1. My playlist for 2025 is mostly dad rock and bad jokes.
  2. Why did the singer bring a ladder? To reach the high notes.
  3. My guitar and I are writing a song. It’s stringing me along.
  4. Why don’t comedians trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
  5. My favorite genre? Rom-comedies with dad jokes.
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Nature and Weather Dad Jokes

  1. Why did the sun refuse to rise? It hit snooze for 2025.
  2. My garden told me it needed space, so I planted fewer seeds.
  3. Why don’t trees tell jokes? They always leave you hanging.
  4. I told the clouds a joke. It rained laughter.
  5. My lawn loves 2025—it’s all about growing and not mowing.
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Sports Dad Jokes

  1. Why did the basketball bring a ladder? It wanted to dunk harder.
  2. I joined a 2025 soccer league, but I keep scoring own goals.
  3. Why did the baseball go to school? To learn to pitch.
  4. My team and I are like dad jokes—always in the running.
  5. Why don’t tennis players tell jokes? They might fault.
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Household Humor Dad Jokes 2025

  1. My dishwasher and I are on the same cycle. Rinse, repeat.
  2. Why did my microwave laugh? It found my leftover jokes.
  3. I told the broom it’s sweeping me off my feet.
  4. My lamp and I are having a bright idea contest. It’s winning.
  5. Why don’t rugs tell jokes? They’re always floored.
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Final Gems

  1. I tried writing a book, but my jokes are more short stories.
  2. Why did my coffee mug feel important? It’s full of beans.
  3. My jokes are like my fridge—always cool but a little outdated.
  4. I joined a club for dad jokers. It’s pun-derful.
  5. Why did the joke break up? It didn’t have good delivery.
  6. My shoes and I go everywhere together—we’re sole mates.
  7. Why don’t pirates tell dad jokes? They arrrr too busy.
  8. I told my mirror a joke, but it reflected poorly.
  9. My remote and I don’t get along—it’s always on pause.
  10. I bought a joke book, but it’s nothing compared to my puns.
  11. Why don’t stars tell jokes? They’re too far out.
  12. My cereal and I start every day on a crunchy note.
  13. Why did the bird bring a suitcase? It wanted to fly first class.
  14. My dog thinks I’m paw-sitively hilarious.
  15. I tried to explain a dad joke to a plant, but it didn’t root for me.

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